30 Days to Emotional Awareness & Wellness Challenge
Day 11: Set Boundaries
Social awareness is key to building emotional intelligence (EI) because it equips us with an ability to understand and effectively respond to others’ needs. Goleman (2015) advised being socially aware requires skill in following three areas:
- Empathy —understanding others’ thoughts, feelings, and concerns from their perspective.
- Organizational awareness —understanding the emotional impact of group politics and power dynamics.
- Service —understanding and meeting others’ needs.
Goleman’s outline of these competencies provides an easy-to-understand framework useful for conceptualizing the overarching topic of social awareness and how it promotes EI skill development. Based on this framework, countless articles and blogs discussing the importance of social awareness in EI have been produced. Most of the existing resources focus on the pros and cons of empathy, strategies for active listening, and the importance of self-awareness in building social awareness.
Over the next few days, we’ll explore each competency included in Goleman’s framework in a bit more depth, but first let’s take a closer look at how we can use our self-awareness to set practical boundaries and maintain our integrity. Establishing personal boundaries and respecting the boundaries of others are basic functions of social awareness.
According to Bockarova (2016), we create personal boundaries based on our sense of self-worth, which she cautioned should not be dependent on others or others’ feelings. She summarized five domains of self-worth that help us self-identify our intrinsic values. These include (para. 3):
- Intellectual worth—the right to personal thoughts and opinions.
- Emotional worth—the right to experience personal feelings in a given situation.
- Physical worth—the right to personal space.
- Social worth—the right to personal friends and to pursue social activities independently.
- Spiritual worth—the right to personal spiritual beliefs.
One of the most important aspects Bockarova pointed out in her review of these self-worth domains is: We all have a right to these entitlements. She also mentioned we should be sure to exercise these rights to develop a healthy level of respect for ourselves and others. Acknowledging our rights as rights we all share helps us accomplish this and increases our social awareness.
Completing an inventory of our intrinsic values allows us set boundaries as well as gain an appreciation and respect for our and others’ rights. Conversely, an absence of social awareness can have negative effects on us and those we encounter in social environments. Access the link below to watch a video that demonstrates what a lack of social awareness looks from the perspective of observers.
What a Lack of Social Awareness Looks Like - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-bcCgM4M7Nc
References
Bockarova, M. (2016, August 1). 4 ways to set and keep personal boundaries. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/romantically-attached/201608/4-ways-set-and-keep-your-personal-boundaries
Goleman, D. (2015, April 5). Daniel Goleman: How emotionally intelligent are you. Retrieved from http://www.danielgoleman.info/daniel-goleman-how-emotionally-intelligent-are-you/
Hf Course Material. (2014, August 8). What a lack of social awareness looks like [YouTube video]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-bcCgM4M7Nc



